Why Hast Thou Forsaken Me?

Oh, Fashion Industry, why do you want to put pregnant women in hideous bathing suits? Who wants horizontal stripes across their abdomen, ever? Are some women concerned that they just don't look pregnant enough? Does something happen to pregnant women to make them not notice the hideous color combinations? Khaki is never appropriate for swimwear. Conversely, black is always appropriate for swimwear so, really, next year, go for less fluorescent pink and more solid black- unless you're Land's End and then let's remember that a large hunk of the pregnant population is under 50 and just start with that. Is maternity swimwear where the suits with skirts designers go to die? In addition, why is it necessary for me to buy my bathing suit when it is still at least a month before I can wear it? How did everyone else know to buy the one cute suit in all of creation in April? Where was my memo?